It’s time to hit the Hershey highway as The DUSE tackles the bizarre tale of Pennsylvania’s very own unicorn killer! (Disclaimer: No unicorns were harmed in the making of this episode.) It’s a bad hair day for the final girl when her Aquanet gets banned and her eco-warrior incel ex-boyfriend decides to do some canceling of his own. The cops take his word that she went out for sprouts and tofu and never came back, but the neighbors complain about a peculiar odor. His new girl has her suspicions too, but does she investigate the reeking box of soup in their bedroom? Of course not! She does what every good college-educated feminist does and makes an art film about how she’s being traumatized by the situation. You could look it up and watch it yourself, or sit back and let Eli and Mel grab the unicorn by the Ira Einhorn in… Pennsylvania!
Music Credit: “Game Boy Horror” by The Zombie Dandies
Originally aired July 21, 2025