Wachow! Whaping! Hiyaaa! Eli and Mel were Kung Fu fighting! And their lips were fast as lightning! Oh the story they told was a little bit frightening! Cause it was about the deadliest man in the world! And we know that didn’t rhyme, but you can’t make it work all the time! Somebody should have said that to our man Count Dante ’cause you know, he might have had some choice fists and words for you. That’s right folks, the D.U.S.E. is covering the man who set Chicago on fire with his Kung Fu moves in the late 60’s. The man that would rather fight you than love you. The man who gave up his entire identity and recreated himself in the fires of Martial Arts! The man who trained in the Chinese mountains with Wushu monks and was the first master of Bullshido! Then he brought those skills to the Cuban Guerrillas, the mean streets of Chicago, underground bareknuckle fighting, Communist Chinese blood sport, the American mainstream sports media, and of course wrote down all his deadly secrets in a manual and sold it to children. Dude was pretty much untouchable and didn’t just talk the talk, proving that with great hair and enough confidence you too could be known as…The Deadliest Man Alive!
Music Credit: “Game Boy Horror” by The Zombie Dandies
Originally aired December 9, 2024
See also:
- The Dojo Wars Part I: The Deadliest Man Alive!
- The Dojo Wars Part II: The Ultimate Sensei!