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Episode 34: The Maury Island Incident: It’s Science FACT-ion!
Brought to you hot off the 1940’s press! Eli disseminates the truth about a very peculiar and very true incident while Mel is wrongfully skeptical of it all. Did a man fight subterranean humanoids under the streets of Germany while the rest of the world fought the Nazis? Do you believe that a simple tool can allow a man to read the thoughts of his coworkers and discover a hidden BDSM dungeon filled with white…
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Episode 33: Cryptids: Bat Boy Loves America
Eli and Mel, while exploring the Allegheny Mountains, discover a strange-looking boy trying to steal Mel’s Play Girl. Instead of beating the abomination against a rock until it turns into a sack of Jello, Eli decides to interview the creature known as Bat Boy. As they sit around the fire, the monstrous boy tells the hosts of D.U.S.E. all about his secret life: all the women he’s seduced, the cars he’s stolen, and every time…
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Episode 32: Saint Patrick’s Day Cryptid Special
Want to know what Eli and Mel love more than smashing beers and wearing green? Talking about cryptids! That’s right folks, you heard it here first: this episode is all about cryptids that wear green…Or is that just a lie fed to you by the people who appropriated the deep culture of turning potatoes into whiskey and having more children than you can feed? Well you can rely on the D.U.S.E. to not only offend…
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Episode 31: The School Girl Killer Part II: Couples Who Play Together
This is Part Two of the most infamous serial murder case covered by the D.U.S.E. thus far. In Part One Eli and Mel discussed the upbringing of two sexual sadists and how they crossed paths. In this titillating second part Eli does his best not to be crass or gross when discussing the sexual assault and murder of numerous women and girls. Can he do it? Probably not. But Mel does her best to reign…
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Episode 30: The Murder at Cherry Hill
Do you know what Eli loves more than himself or rocky road ice-cream? Women! That’s right folks, you heard it here first! Eli loves women and he loves them so much he devoted two and a half hours of his life to them and he isn’t even going to ask for them back (not that he could get them back anyways). But his love doesn’t come cheap. Can you handle the slander he spews at…
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Episode 29: The Zebra Murders
Mel and Eli celebrate Black History Month in the best possible fashion — by being insensitive while covering a difficult and rarely talked about subject. Will they manage to disseminate the truth to the masses or incite a mostly peaceful protest? Sure the case was a simple mass murder spree in San Francisco, on the surface, but scratch at the crust a little and all the secrets of today come tumbling out. Was it the…
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Episode 28: Luka Magnotta Part II: Getting Their Kermuppins
The long awaited return of Luka Magnotta is here! With Eli and Mel driving the struggle bus towards this story’s conclusion there’s only one question on everyone’s mind…When will past Eli strike? Will it be when the story includes three hands? How about four feet? And then there was the thing with the body having its head in three separate locations simultaneously. Was Jun Lin some kind of three headed freak or does past Eli…
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Episode 27: Valentine’s Day Special: Roman Family Values
Love, sex, and Mel’s embarrassment are indistinguishable in this excuse for Eli to talk about the one thing that means more to him than life itself…Love. Or is it sex? What’s the difference? We’ll find out as Eli tells the transformational history that may or may not be true of Saint Valentine’s Day. The D.U.S.E. doesn’t discriminate when it comes to kinks so if it’s drunken naked men whipping equally naked women with bloody strips…
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Episode 26: The Curse of the Crying Boy
Eli and Mel bring you the hottest story yet! There’s pyro-mancers, possibly pedophilic but definitely weird artists that may or may not have existed, and the living embodiment of evil in the form of a little boy. Do you like English muffins? Well we don’t have those but we do have plenty of ragamuffins and shifty tabloid journalists. Eli has a spicy admission involving fire setting and a near and dear portion of himself while…
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Episode 25: Murder Plots Too Strange To Be Real
Do you like murder plots? How about fake mustaches, parkas, fake arms, guns, cats who want to kill their owners, lawyers who want to bone a loser’s wife, nerds who incessantly take notes? What about coke-head sons, insurance scams, CIA hit men, women who are just bored to death, botched murders, kitty litter, football, cookies, and FBI investigations into rumors of homemade explosive collars and extortion? If you answered yes to any of those then…
