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Episode 130: The Dojo Wars Part II: The Ultimate Sensei!
Concise strikes to your dome piece! That’s what this episode is about. Eli and Mel bring you the finisher of the story of Count Dante, the guy who was known as the “Most Dangerous Man in the World,” who ran several of his own dojos, was a founding member of America’s martial arts scene, owner of a used car dealership, purveyor of smut and kicking butt, kung fu terrorist, world renowned classical singer, bank robber,…
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Episode 129: The Dojo Wars Part I: The Deadliest Man Alive!
Wachow! Whaping! Hiyaaa! Eli and Mel were Kung Fu fighting! And their lips were fast as lightning! Oh the story they told was a little bit frightening! Cause it was about the deadliest man in the world! And we know that didn’t rhyme, but you can’t make it work all the time! Somebody should have said that to our man Count Dante ’cause you know, he might have had some choice fists and words for…
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Episode 128: The Pleiadians: Don’t Look Behind the Curtain!
Knowledge given isn’t as useful as knowledge earned. That’s the moral of this week’s episode! Eli has lived his life based on this nugget of truth and now so shall you as you join your two favorite podcast hosts on a trip down a deep dark rabbit hole of modern history. This episode is not for the faint of heart, so listener beware! If you love having your head buried in the sand or like…
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Episode 127: Thanksgiving Special: A Reasonable Person
Happy Thanksgiving! Nothing says “Let’s gather around the table and share in tradition” like the story of a man who’s had just about enough tomfoolery. A man’s house is his castle after all and he should be allowed to protect his castle, right? Wrong! If you’re a bleeding-heart liberal you might have a thing or two to say about that. We live in a world where a man is portrayed as a deluded monster when…
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Episode 126: The Amazing Chris-Chan: The #MeToo Saga
Do you know what that smell is? Well it certainly isn’t your grandma’s apple pie! No sir, this pie is filled with extortion, tears, adults throwing temper tantrums, public attacks on white business owners, assaults on police officers, melees going down in parking lots, women who just gotta make everything about themselves but can’t define what a woman is, men who think they’re men but act like women, the death of a lumberjack, and of…
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Episode 125: The Yandere Killer: Dog Science
Eli and Mel break down boundaries and conduct an experiment for the sake of science! Do the majority of our listeners click on an episode because they like the sound of our voices? Or is it because they see a dog in the art? Who knows! But we’re committed to finding out through the scientific process… Also there’s some mighty big talk about the not-so-much a murderer “Yandere Killer” who may or may not have…
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Episode 124: The Amazing Chris-Chan: The Tom-Girl Saga
In this episode the story of Chris-Chan gets a little darker. If you thought the darkest this story would get would be an autistic bumblebutt of a man taking creep shots of children at a game store and shouting antisemitic remarks at a man who might not actually be Jewish… well, this episode says “Hold my beer!” It gets even darker. With a revelation from Chris-Chan about how he now identifies as a “tom-girl” which…
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Episode 123: The Pleiadians: Prison Lovers
That’s right folks! Eli and Mel are bringing back the “summer of funky alien butt love!” A limited time offer, just so they can blow through the rest of Jmmanual’s Talmud and then the story can go on hiatus until next summer. Oh don’t be so sad, they handle the situation in style. That’s right folks, this episode covers the next four chapters of the “true” bible and not the one you’ve been brainwashed into…
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Episode 122: A Vlad Halloween Special Part II: Really Liked Trees
Getting a sense of déjà vu? Yeah, us too! But that’s because this is Part II of our Halloween Special! In this episode Eli and Mel talk about how our boy Vlad Dracula became known as Vlad the Impaler. In the latter half of his story Vlad takes over Wallachia, ends the internal threats to his throne, reforms the social structure just because he’s such a nice guy, and went back to school to get…
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Episode 121: A Vlad Halloween Special Part I: Super Based
Happy Halloween to the D.U.S.E. Nation! For your holiday enjoyment, Eli and Mel bring you the most based of European leaders: Vlad the Impaler! Nothing screams Halloween more than the story of one of the most feared and effective Balkan leaders in all of European history. Vlad Dracula witnessed his father’s rise and fall, was held captive by a bunch of Muslims, and eventually took his father’s place at the helm of Wallachia, a tiny…
